Please tell me that sleepless nights happen to all artists. This is when spirits, ghost and geniuses visit normally . Especially on the full moon eve, when the wolf nature awakens. But today during a seminar I learnt that this animal symbolizes our mind, and when not at peace it spins chasing its tail. Mine is clearly going crazy tonight.

I am too tired to sleep. I am too tired to create, excluding the camomile tea I prepared from a yellow-greyish powder mixed with water, like an aquarelle. I wish it makes peaceful patterns when I spill it over my aching soul. This pain paralyses, cuts the circulation of ideas in the veins. The light is off and inspiration can’t find the way. Friends continue the party elsewhere. The artist’s room turns into a concrete cocoon.

This malaria, unfulfilled loved came unexpected. Transmitted by an innocent glance spread to all cells and blocked its functions. Approaching anyone with this kind of sick emotion would be selfish and if one can’t express love, what’s the point of being cured?

But maybe there is a medicine that can heal this feeling and bring back an artist to life. He needs to create, no matter what. This is the only solace in any condition of mind, body and heart. If not on paper, if not in a chord, if not visual or without a shape, create in the thoughts. Sew an image bright as the Sun, weave a dream of you together, cut out negativity in the montage and win an Oscar for Hope.

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